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The word yearn annoys me. It phonetically sounds like pussy shit. I managed to dodge learning about yearning because I don’t come across it very often in my dealings with real ones. The literary app leaks it to me. Lo and behold. It is pussy shit. Yearning is valuing what you desperately want instead of what you immediately control , which reduces what you control, making it less likely to get what you want. This Newsletter is reader-supported. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. It’s a strong feeling of deep desire or longing, often for something that is terminally over and is never going to happen. It often reflects a magical wish for something that one simply cannot have without a work ethic they don’t possess, time they don’t possess, or it comes with dire consequences for themselves and others. The biggest yearn is the thing or person who got away. Some yearn for the toxic ex while raising a family. Some yearn for the big break ...

  The uncomfortable truth about the “Autism Crisis” Autistic individuals have a suicide attempt rate 2-8 times higher than the general population, and are 3 to 5 times more likely to die by suicide. Autistic people have the lowest employment rates of any disabled group, with only 30% of autistic people in employment currently. The question is: Why? I’ve been diving into the data from the University of Cambridge study released yesterday. It’s the kind of research that makes your stomach turn. I’m about to share why the “mental health crisis” in the neurodivergent community isn’t what they’re telling you it is. This is the knowledge the system ignores because once you see it, you realise the “disorder” isn’t in the brain at all. The Findings: Experts found that the 3–5 times higher risk of suicide in the autistic community is largely rooted in lifelong inequalities , ranging from education and employment to healthcare gaps. The only solution: Researchers are urging governments to m...

If you listen to corporate Human Resources departments, the modern workplace is a bastion of “Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion” (DEI). We are told that talent is the only metric that matters, that different minds are valued, and that we are living in the golden age of accommodation. The data proves this is a lie. For us, the modern workplace is more than difficult. It’s a system of structural exclusion designed to filter us out, grind us down, and eject us. The unemployment statistics are not a “coincidental gap” they are a chasm of wasted potential and ruined lives at the hands of systemic failure and brutal human nature. UK data consistently shows that while roughly 80% of non-disabled people are employed, only about 29-30% of autistic people are in full-time work. This is the lowest employment rate of any disability group. This isn’t an accident. It is the result of a labour market built by neurotypicals, for neurotypicals, where “cultural fit” is a weaponized term used to enforce n...

  I’m naturally very high in Dark Triad traits. I’m self-centred, always filtering a plan through “how does it affect me though”. I’m a career salesperson and lifelong social chameleon, and I have selective empathy to protect myself because when it’s activated, it’s ACTIVATED. So I leave my empathy off most of the time. What grinds my gears is seeing these traits I work against myself to overcome be paraded as the silver bullet that will save young men from themselves. I work against this side of me and look for the right amount of empathy to connect without overloading my circuits and bleeding my heart all over the place.  Because that’s what makes life human, real and fun. Throwing that away on purpose is retarded. I also contend with Persistant Demand Avoidance to make this happen. But the powerful combo of Dark Triad, PDA, a Sales Career, years in the Redpill space from a young age, and a bunch of other factors kept me in this dark hole cosplaying as a psycho for years, th...

It’s over / We’re so back We did what we were told. Invested in competence. Skills. Internal systems. We assumed honesty mattered, that effort compounded, and that mastery eventually translated into stability. We were told to believe the world was a place where cause and effect still loosely lined up. That belief didn’t come from nowhere. Schools rewarded it. Therapists reinforced it. Parents repeated it because it once worked for them. For minds wired toward structure, consistency, and depth, it felt natural. Safe even. And then the world changed before our eyes without bothering to update the contract. We were optimised for environments where accuracy mattered, responsibility had weight, just showing up repeatedly, doing the work, and not bullshitting people built trust over time. That model required patience, memory, and above all else a shared reality. It assumes institutions have some continuity and that rules, while imperfect, were at least real. For a while, this wasn’t a lie. I...